If I could ask you just one thing for now, I would ask you to help me believe I can be better than this.
среда, 22 февраля 2012 г.
to overcome all the difficulties with grace and dignity
I am a human and I make mistakes,
sometimes I am confused,
sometimes I become the worst version of myself.
What I want to learn is to let go,
to overcome all the difficulties with grace and dignity,
be decent and do my best,
be honest with myself, which is probably the most difficult part of it.
It suddenly made me feel a little bit relieved when I finally realized that it's not about being a perfect creature never making mistakes, it's about being a good person...about having this great heart and trying not to let it down. I just have to learn how not to let the voices of all these people who don't really know my heart and don't know my history and situation suppress my own inner voice.
I have to stop thinking I need all these people.
I just have to face the truth - there is no way to help everybody and to be good for everybody, all I can do is be courageous enough to stay open and let them in, because one has to be so damn strong to do that! All I can do is to give them all the kindness and warmth I have, and accept that sometimes it's not enough for them, and it's no use regretting if they don't see it, don't appreciate or simply don't need it.
I have to stop overreacting.
Regrets don't work, neither do expectations.
Don't give up, keep on being yourself.
I need to stop trying to justify myself, make excuses or explain why I am who I am to somebody who often doesn't even give a damn, the best I can do is to be responsible to myself for every my thought and deed, be conscious.
I should never regret what's done and what's in my heart. That's who I am and I have to accept myself, because I am the person I have to live with so I'd better be the person I can respect or at least bear for the beginning. See this person crystal clear, forgive her, accept her, have the strongest belief in her, because it is never too late to open up your heart and move on.
sometimes I am confused,
sometimes I become the worst version of myself.
What I want to learn is to let go,
to overcome all the difficulties with grace and dignity,
be decent and do my best,
be honest with myself, which is probably the most difficult part of it.
It suddenly made me feel a little bit relieved when I finally realized that it's not about being a perfect creature never making mistakes, it's about being a good person...about having this great heart and trying not to let it down. I just have to learn how not to let the voices of all these people who don't really know my heart and don't know my history and situation suppress my own inner voice.
I have to stop thinking I need all these people.
I just have to face the truth - there is no way to help everybody and to be good for everybody, all I can do is be courageous enough to stay open and let them in, because one has to be so damn strong to do that! All I can do is to give them all the kindness and warmth I have, and accept that sometimes it's not enough for them, and it's no use regretting if they don't see it, don't appreciate or simply don't need it.
I have to stop overreacting.
Regrets don't work, neither do expectations.
Don't give up, keep on being yourself.
I need to stop trying to justify myself, make excuses or explain why I am who I am to somebody who often doesn't even give a damn, the best I can do is to be responsible to myself for every my thought and deed, be conscious.
I should never regret what's done and what's in my heart. That's who I am and I have to accept myself, because I am the person I have to live with so I'd better be the person I can respect or at least bear for the beginning. See this person crystal clear, forgive her, accept her, have the strongest belief in her, because it is never too late to open up your heart and move on.
пятница, 17 февраля 2012 г.
Я влюбилась в это стихотворение с первого прочтения. Если бы у меня попросили зачитать какое-то одно стихотворение, которое было бы точно про меня, я , очень вероятно, зачитала бы именно это.
АСАДОВ
Когда мне встречается в людях дурное,
То долгое время я верить стараюсь,
Что это скорее всего напускное,
Что это случайность. И я ошибаюсь.
И, мыслям подобным ища подтвержденья,
Стремлюсь я поверить, забыв про укор,
Что лжец, может, просто большой фантазер,
А хам, он, наверно, такой от смущенья.
Что сплетник, шагнувший ко мне на порог,
Возможно, по глупости разболтался,
А друг, что однажды в беде не помог,
Не предал, а просто тогда растерялся.
Я вовсе не прячусь от бед под крыло.
Иными тут мерками следует мерить.
Ужасно не хочется верить во зло,
И в подлость ужасно не хочется верить!
Поэтому, встретив нечестных и злых,
Нередко стараешься волей-неволей
В душе своей словно бы выправить их
И попросту "отредактировать", что ли!
Но факты и время отнюдь не пустяк.
И сколько порой ни насилуешь душу,
А гниль все равно невозможно никак
Ни спрятать, ни скрыть, как ослиные уши.
Ведь злого, признаться, мне в жизни моей
Не так уж и мало встречать доводилось.
И сколько хороших надежд поразбилось,
И сколько вот так потерял я друзей!
И все же, и все же я верить не брошу,
Что надо в начале любого пути
С хорошей, с хорошей и только с хорошей,
С доверчивой меркою к людям идти!
Пусть будут ошибки (такое не просто),
Но как же ты будешь безудержно рад,
Когда эта мерка придется по росту
Тому, с кем ты станешь богаче стократ!
Пусть циники жалко бормочут, как дети,
Что, дескать, непрочная штука - сердца...
Не верю! Живут, существуют на свете
И дружба навек, и любовь до конца!
И сердце твердит мне: ищи же и действуй.
Но только одно не забудь наперед:
Ты сам своей мерке большой соответствуй,
И все остальное, увидишь,- придет!
АСАДОВ
Когда мне встречается в людях дурное,
То долгое время я верить стараюсь,
Что это скорее всего напускное,
Что это случайность. И я ошибаюсь.
И, мыслям подобным ища подтвержденья,
Стремлюсь я поверить, забыв про укор,
Что лжец, может, просто большой фантазер,
А хам, он, наверно, такой от смущенья.
Что сплетник, шагнувший ко мне на порог,
Возможно, по глупости разболтался,
А друг, что однажды в беде не помог,
Не предал, а просто тогда растерялся.
Я вовсе не прячусь от бед под крыло.
Иными тут мерками следует мерить.
Ужасно не хочется верить во зло,
И в подлость ужасно не хочется верить!
Поэтому, встретив нечестных и злых,
Нередко стараешься волей-неволей
В душе своей словно бы выправить их
И попросту "отредактировать", что ли!
Но факты и время отнюдь не пустяк.
И сколько порой ни насилуешь душу,
А гниль все равно невозможно никак
Ни спрятать, ни скрыть, как ослиные уши.
Ведь злого, признаться, мне в жизни моей
Не так уж и мало встречать доводилось.
И сколько хороших надежд поразбилось,
И сколько вот так потерял я друзей!
И все же, и все же я верить не брошу,
Что надо в начале любого пути
С хорошей, с хорошей и только с хорошей,
С доверчивой меркою к людям идти!
Пусть будут ошибки (такое не просто),
Но как же ты будешь безудержно рад,
Когда эта мерка придется по росту
Тому, с кем ты станешь богаче стократ!
Пусть циники жалко бормочут, как дети,
Что, дескать, непрочная штука - сердца...
Не верю! Живут, существуют на свете
И дружба навек, и любовь до конца!
И сердце твердит мне: ищи же и действуй.
Но только одно не забудь наперед:
Ты сам своей мерке большой соответствуй,
И все остальное, увидишь,- придет!
четверг, 16 февраля 2012 г.
My inspiration
I don’t need drugs or alcohol to ease my pain. I don’t need a medicine to get well and find peace of mind. My favourite music is always enough and even more for me. It’s always there to rescue me and to be always there for me. It’s my panacea and my heaven. It’s my inspiration and my saving grace. Thanks to music I always have a place to go and to escape into.
I want to say some words about ATB. It has been with me since my childhood, since I remember myself.
Is there a person you don't know personally, but if he or she dies it will be a personal loss for you? For me André Tanneberger is such a person.
I don't need to know him personally to see how beautiful his soul is, because any art comes from soul and reveals it. I wish I had a chance to let him know what his music has always meant to me and beyond any doubt will always mean. It has the greatest impact on me, and the best one. It is now a part of me. If any music played in my soul, in my inner world, it would be something very alike ATB if not it itself. :) It saved me, it was there for me when nobody else was. I wish I had words to express how grateful I am. I think my heart is too small to hold my enormous love to his music. There can barely be enough place to hold this great feeling, which I cannot even find words to describe. It's more than music, it actually touches upon my very being and heals it in some magical way, giving me strength and virtue. This is my real friend and I believe it truly and deeply. It made me want to live when I was stupid enough not to find other reasons for it. It made me believe in myself. It still does. It helps me to open my heart. I am never lonely while I have ATB music in my headphones. World will always be a worthy place until I have this music in my heart. Thank you so much, André Tanneberger. "I would thank you from the bottom of my heart, but for you my heart has no bottom".
I want to say some words about ATB. It has been with me since my childhood, since I remember myself.
Is there a person you don't know personally, but if he or she dies it will be a personal loss for you? For me André Tanneberger is such a person.
I don't need to know him personally to see how beautiful his soul is, because any art comes from soul and reveals it. I wish I had a chance to let him know what his music has always meant to me and beyond any doubt will always mean. It has the greatest impact on me, and the best one. It is now a part of me. If any music played in my soul, in my inner world, it would be something very alike ATB if not it itself. :) It saved me, it was there for me when nobody else was. I wish I had words to express how grateful I am. I think my heart is too small to hold my enormous love to his music. There can barely be enough place to hold this great feeling, which I cannot even find words to describe. It's more than music, it actually touches upon my very being and heals it in some magical way, giving me strength and virtue. This is my real friend and I believe it truly and deeply. It made me want to live when I was stupid enough not to find other reasons for it. It made me believe in myself. It still does. It helps me to open my heart. I am never lonely while I have ATB music in my headphones. World will always be a worthy place until I have this music in my heart. Thank you so much, André Tanneberger. "I would thank you from the bottom of my heart, but for you my heart has no bottom".
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